I would like to say that as a creative person, I play all the time, but that’s not true. I am a working mom of three. By the time I get home, I am so burnt out and exhausted from work that I don’t have the same energy to play with my kids the way they would like. My daughter has a massive dollhouse field with barbies, Disney princesses and millions of tiny animals. I’ve always dreamed of having these filling my home, creating stories and wondrous worlds with my daughter, however, it doesn’t happen as much as I’d like.
I remember hours of playing with my dolls and stuffed animals, creating adventures for them to go on. Occasionally, I had friends over, but for the most part, I kept myself occupied. I couldn’t really have my brother play with me. Not that he couldn’t play with dolls, it’s just that he would not have his action figures rescuing my unicorns. Most of the time, they were the reason the unicorn needed to be reduced. I don’t think I was lonely or anything like that. I just enjoyed making up stories and having them play out the way I wanted them to.
I wish my daughter was the same, and in ways she is. She will create crime scenes for her dolls to investigate. She has no problem weaving intricate stories for her toys. However, it is a struggle for her to do it by herself. She will ask me to play. Sometimes I do, but the way she wants to play is to tell me how my doll should act, and what path they should go on. I’m not really playing; I’m more like puppeteering the dolls for her. Most of the time I am fine with it, however when I go off script she meltdown. This turns into a conversation about how when you play, you can not dictate what people do. It’s a learning moment, but not one I want to have.
I know these moments won’t last forever and I cherish them. I just wish I didn’t have to weave them between work, cleaning, sports, and dinner time.
As I got older, I savored spending more of my time outside, primarily at the beach. Surfing was my escape. I didn’t see it as playing, but more of a chance to relax and clear my mind. My daughter is following in my footsteps. She loves being at the beach, building sand castles and playing in the waves. Last summer she finally grasped her swim lessons. I’m hoping as the seasons warms I will make her a stronger swimmer. That way I’ll be able to bring her out on my longboard. I know it will be a struggle at first, but the ocean is one of the best teachers in getting up and trying again.
My playtime has been trying. I find little joy in scarfing my precious time for myself. It’s undoubtedly not healthy to look at it that way, but I’m working on it. Active 1: Instead of waiting for my kids to fall asleep or sneaking away to find time to write, my daughter and I cuddled on the couch. She’s watching a movie and I’m typing next to her. Since she knows how much mommy loves to write, Adelyn keeps peeking over at my words. She read the beginning of the post and a huge smile grew across her face when she realized was writing about her. I didn’t set out to create a total mini me; however, she already has her own stack of journals with stories filling the pages.
While playtime looks different from what I imagined it would be growing up. I know I’m doing the best with my kids. They are their own unique little monsters who I have to learn with them as I navigate what now brings me joy in life.
