Tag: personal time

Lent

Day 31: Spring break, the chance to do nothing

Alexandra Diane

While many see spring break as a chance to travel and go on adventures, I took it as an opportunity to have downtime with my family. I’ve not so secretly loved knowing there were riptides at the beach and that Adelyn isn’t the best swimmer. It’s allowed me to stay home and enjoy doing nothing without the guilt.

This break from our busy schedules has allowed me the ability to catch up on neglected housework. Though I’m not where I want to be, I have cleaned the bathrooms and gone through the mail. The stockpile of mail has been taunting me since November. I hate opening mail. It tends to be bills and nothing fun.

Aside from housework, I have spent a lot of time sitting on the floor with my tiny raptor. Bennett has become very vocal and produces new and interesting sounds. Most of them come from being disgruntled that he can’t move where he wants to yet. Although today has been a major milestone, he has rolled over six times in a row. All while yelling at me.

This time at home has also let me focus on my writing. I didn’t know how well I’d be able to keep up with my lent writing challenge, but every day I wrote something new. Now I may not complete it on the day I created the post, but I do at least start it. There was a day this week when I pushed out three new posts. I’m still grinding away at posts 11 and 12. They are the most complicated for me to write. I have to capture emotions and feelings from the past while not making the post extra flowery and taking away from the truth of the story.

Adelyn has been enjoying the one and one time too. She told me the other day that she is sad I have to spend all my time with the baby. I had worried about this when I was pregnant, and now she was vocalizing it. However, by being home and actively being able to put the baby down for a nap, I can focus my time on her. We’ve read books, made cupcakes, and snuggled on the couch watching her favorite shows. During the week, I spend a lot of individual time with her. But she doesn’t see it that way. She’s five, and it doesn’t process the same as an adult. But when she sees me putting her brother down for a nap and me coming to spend time with her, it makes her happy.

One of my favorite thing about being home this week is tormenting my husband. I know he thoroughly enjoys me being here with no true task to do. This leaves me with all the freedom in the world to demand his attention while he works. Being a stage five clinger is just one perk he gained when he married me.

All joking aside, I have loved the time he and I have been able to have. Usually, we see each other for a few hours a day, most of them on a ball field. But there were only two practices this week; the rest of the week has been free of baseball responsibilities.

Last night was probably my favorite night of the entire week. While Mr. Bennett refused to go to sleep, Tyler and I started playing “name that song.” It wasn’t something we planned on doing; it just happened. He had his Spotify app open and random tunes played. Sometimes I knew the song on the first note, and there were other times when I had to wait until the lyrics started. We did this for probably two hours. Switching from song to song, talking about memories they evoked, or making us look up different things about the bands. The night was perfect.

As we went back and forth, naming the bands and songs, I couldn’t help but think about how happy I was. This was all I’ve ever wanted out of life, to feel complete with my partner. To be comfortable in our own space and enjoy each other company. We didn’t have to do anything extravagant. Peace and simplicity tend to be undervalued. I love how comfortable Tyler and I are with each other. How easy our conversations are. Even after driving him insane from the moment I wake until he goes to bed, we always have something to talk about or share. Would it have been nice to go on vacation this spring break? Of course, it would have. I am always up for a new adventure. But if we weren’t home, there would have been so many natural moments that would have been missed.

Lent, Teaching

Day 4: Work Life Balance

Alexandra Diane

There is something strange about having a tiny communications device always attached to you. Because of this, it gives people the false sense that they are entitled to your time. This way of thinking is highly prominent when it comes to work-life balance. People expect you to respond to them immediately and get upset when you don’t. They don’t understand that, yes, they may send you a message, but that does not mean that you are under any obligation to respond. 

I have found this way of thinking to have been amplified since becoming a teacher. 

When I worked in broadcasting, I received a plethora of emails at odd hours. The network I worked at aired in the Middle East, and since I lived on the east coast of Florida, it meant my primary communications would be late at night or in the early morning hours. But I also worked from 3 to 11 at night to accommodate this kind of communication. 

There were a few times when I was on vacation that I had to call into work and walk someone through where to find the files. I received compensation for working during my time off. 

This kind of compensation is not extended to teachers or really to anyone for that matter. 

As a teacher, I expect emails from parents and students, but I did not expect the entitlement of how quickly both parties expect responses back. I have received emails from students while I was teaching, and I could not respond. That student sent me six emails in a matter of fifteen minutes, demanding I answer their question. Mind you; this student asked when I would enter their grade for their late work that should have been turned in three weeks prior. While this kind of correspondence is utterly uncalled for, I can excuse it slightly because my students’ ages range from 11 to 14.

What isn’t excusable is the same behavior from their parents. 

My contracted work hours are from 8:45 am – 4:15 pm, Monday through Friday. I do not earn extra pay or time off working outside those hours. I arrive at work usually around 8:15 and begin answering emails. I will even answer emails after hours if I’m not busy with my family. In the last three years, parents and students have exploited this time extension. 

When I started teaching, the emails came between 4:30 to five. But now, in my third year, emails are coming in at all hours of the night. Students and parents are emailing me between nine and ten at night. A: I don’t read them because my newborn needs my full attention, B: I’m usually getting ready for bed, and C: I teach tv production, and nothing significant requires an immediate answer. 

Students have become so accustomed to emailing teachers whenever they feel like it they don’t ask questions during school hours. They don’t feel it’s necessary because if they have any issues, they can email at midnight. Even though it’s not expected or encouraged for teachers to communicate after hours, that does not mean I haven’t received hostile emails from parents because I didn’t respond when their student asked me a question—those emails I choose to ignore until the next school day. There are zero reasons for me to get upset or flustered over things I can’t fix at home. 

If a student had a question on a project, they should have asked it during class. I make sure students have ample time to complete their work in school. I know students these days have a lot on their plate, and as I said, I teach TV Production. They shouldn’t be stressing over my class when they have much more complicated math and ela classes to worry about. 

It’s disappointing how many emails I have waiting for me when all my students know my classroom door opens a full hour before school starts. When I have encouraged them to come in in the mornings for help, they tell me it’s too early, or their parents won’t bring them because it doesn’t fit into their schedule. I’ve been told that if I just answered my emails over the weekend, they wouldn’t have to come in early. But then I informed them that answering their emails after hours didn’t fit into my schedule.